Without God

I have just read George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-four. A compelling read, albeit a rather disturbing one as so many of the ideas written about in 1949 are scarily possible today. The one thing I found so awful though, was the apparent lack of any religion of any sort, it was not allowed. Can you imagine a life where there is no choice, no hope, no certainty of a better future, no comfort from a Lord and Saviour, no God? It would be a living hell and surely George Orwell's book gives a foretaste of what actual hell will be like for those who have not yet given their hearts to the Lord. To be separated from God does not bear thinking about and yet that is what is promised to those who refuse to believe.

A few weeks ago I had my Bible bag stolen - it is not necessary for me to list here the whys, wherefores, how, who and what but, needless to say, it caused a lot of inconvenience and unnecessary worry. The one thing that should have been the easiest to replace was the Bible itself but this has proved to be the hardest loss of all.

A few years ago I was introduced to the Precept Ministries Inductive Bible Study and this rather large tomb was the one I used for this purpose. The study encourages highlighting key words and phrases with different colours and symbols which makes it easier to examine them more closely and cross reference them with other Scriptures. Prior to this, I had never liked marking any sort of book and would never even turn over a corner of a page to keep my place. As I could not bare to deface a Bible I already had I purchased this one specifically for studying. The Bible itself contains all the instructions for each of the 66 books within and I had spent the best part of the last decade gradually working my way through. I had only Matthew and Mark left to study in the New Testament and had completed well over a third of the Old Testament books so my Bible was much marked and well worn - an old friend that I was very comfortable with. Every week day morning I get myself ready then sit down between 7-7.30am to study my Bible before breakfasting and going off to work. Everyone else is still in bed and it is my special time with the Lord.

The morning after my bag had been stolen I sat down to my study as usual and pulled out one of my (many) other Bibles. Fortunately, I could still remember the subject I had been looking at and was able to continue with this for the rest of the week. But then I ground to a halt. With no instructions on what to do I began to flounder and couldn't get motivated. I was flicking through, opening pages at random hoping that God would make something leap of the page. For two weeks I carried on in this pattern, starting to feel anxious, depressed and generally miserable and hardly reading anything of God's word at all. Then came a week's holiday from work (we did not go away, just visiting relatives and pottering around) and my routine was disturbed so I didn't even bother with the aimless page turning. I felt totally restless and empty - something was most definitely lacking in my life and I knew what it was - God!

I had certainly been speaking to Him over the last few weeks (shouting too at times!) and had prayed for the person who had taken my bag. I had no ill feeling towards that person and asked that they would open my Bible and read it or, failing that, the person who found it might do - as long as it was not wasted, thrown in some bin.

My lovely Bible was gone, covered in all my colourful markings, showing everyone who saw me reading it it how good I was and how much time I must have spent on it. I loved it when a passage I had completed was read out in church and anyone near me could get a glimpse of how much I had done. I had started to race through each section eager to mark off another book as done and trying to estimate how long it would take me to complete the whole Bible - I couldn't wait, how proud I would be. 

And then it hit me - Pride! Perhaps God had taken this Bible from me because I was too conceited over what I had done in it rather than what He was showing me. Maybe my rush to get through the studies was taking over from the content and God wanted me to slow down and actually digest what He was saying to me. I needed to forget the past (I am highly unlikely to get back my old Bible) and start anew so, on Saturday evening, I ordered a new Bible - the same translation as the one I have lost but without all the study guides and it duly arrived the next day.

Today is Bank Holiday Monday but I arose early while the rest of the house was asleep and stole downstairs. I picked up my new Bible and also a book I had had some time called Come Walk In My Ways by Kay Arthur which uses the Inductive Study method - this book is going to cover 1&2 Kings and 2 Chronicles. I took up my coloured pens and started marking key words.

That first chapter this morning has been balm to my soul and I could feel peace and calm come over me as I worked. Just the act of marking the text is very therapeutic but it was more than that - I was very conscious of taking all the words in slowly and letting them breathe through me. Today I have felt calm and happier in myself than I have for a while.

I had been quite despondent at the thought of all that lost work and having to start over again - especially as I could quite clearly see the end goal and had been charging towards it. Once I had ticked off a book I was always reluctant to go back and re-read it when there were still new ones to be studied, "I know that part, why should I go back and look again?".O foolish woman! God has other plans and has given you a new start. I now have, literally, a clean slate and can take in things through fresh eyes with a fresh page to look at each morning. There will be nothing to spoil or distract the view of any revelation that might be given me today, no hang over from yesterday. I am free to read and learn and discover again.

The Lord's loving-kindnesses indeed never cease, 

for His compassions never fail.

They are new every morning; 

Great is Your faithfulness

Lamentations 3:22-23

And the answer is..........

When the date was getting close to my son taking his R.E. GCSE exam I asked him how his revising was coming along. His reply was there was no need to study because the only answers you needed for this particular paper were God, Jesus and The Bible. He bore this out by saying one of the questions in the mock paper was “who did the two disciples meet on the Damascus Road” so, not knowing the answer, opted for one of his stock replies, Jesus – and, of course, he was right. 

Whereas this might be a somewhat flippant response, typical of a teenage boy not wanting to waste precious moments going over old notes when he could be linking up with his friends on Xbox, and not particularly showing our education system in very good light if there really were only three possible choices for the answers in this subject, it did get me to thinking that he wasn't far from the truth. By turning to God, Jesus or The Bible the majority of today’s problems can either be solved or we will be given the strength, change of attitude or ability to work them through.

God is the creator of all things and, as I sit typing this in my garden on a warm May afternoon, it is easy to believe this. The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming and white fluffy clouds drift across the sky. The sound of my neighbours enjoying the day in their gardens with happy children laughing as they splash in a paddling pool while the mouth-watering smell of BBQ’s drifts through the air make for an idyllic picture of family life and it is natural to thank God for all He has provided. It is not always so easy to do this when the rain and wind come, the neighbours are fighting with each other and the kids are screaming but God is still there all the same, loving us through the good and the bad and He always wants the best for us whether we see it or not. We just need to trust in Him and focus on what He wants us to do, not what the world is telling us do. We have to remember that God has a different agenda to ours and His plan is far more intricate than we ever dare imagine. Do what you know is right with Him and everything else will fall in to place. It might seem impossible and you feel the task is too mighty but if it is from God the doors will open and He will give you strength and knowledge. With God all things are possible and He has the answer to everything.

Jesus is not only the Son of God, He is our friend, our brother, our Saviour and even acts as an intercessor between us and our heavenly Father. He is also very much alive and lives in every believer’s heart through His Holy Spirit. With this we are equipped to discern what is good and bad, what is from God and what is not and enables us to tap into the very thoughts of God. Jesus loved us all so much that He took our place on the cross and died for our sins. Just think, the very worst thing that you have ever done was the very moment that He died in your place – it makes me so ashamed to think that He even knows what I did, let alone took my punishment for me. All I have to do is believe who He is, what He did and that He was raised, victorious, from the dead and I will spend eternity with Him – how incredible is that? But while I am here on earth in my mortal body I can talk to Him and ask Him to show me the way He wants me to go. All the answers lie with Jesus so just fix your eyes on Him and you cannot go wrong.

The Bible is the very word of God in handy book form for us to delve into whenever we want. Whatever you want to know in relation to the way you live or about getting on with others, you will find the answer in this wonderful book. It never ceases to amaze me that I can read a particular passage of scripture time and time again, believing I understand what it is saying then, suddenly, the meaning changes and leaps at me off the page coming alive and becoming relevant to a particular circumstance I am in at that moment. Of course, this is not always a pleasant experience because sometimes the words convict me of something that is wrong in my life which I need to change. Just like old Jonah who’s first instinct was to run in the opposite direction from where God wanted him to go, I do not always want to obey what the Word is telling me and quickly turn the page. However, the Bible is no ordinary book, it might have been written thousands of years ago but it is just as relevant to me today as it was when it was first put on paper. This is the living Word of God and it will not let me go – every time I open my Bible the same message comes through loud and clear, wherever I turn – even when I am in church and others read or preach I hear that same message piercing its way into my heart.  In the end my only option is to do what it is telling me. And then I have peace.

Of course, as a more mature Christian I would also add the Holy Spirit and prayer to the list as they act as ‘telephone lines’ between the others but I don’t think my son was far wrong in his statement – the answer to all questions is either God, Jesus or The Bible!

God changes hearts

I was once told that, when you are finding it hard to cope with someone or a situation, if you trust in God and follow His commandments, He will either change the heart of the other person, take you out of the situation altogether or change your heart. It has just occurred to me that all three of these things have happened to me in the last few years.


The first time I came to know the reality of this was quite a long time ago when I had to work alongside a lady who was making me very miserable, although I would be hard pressed to put my finger on why, and I often wonder if there was some sort of evil spirit in her that was conflicting with me. It was really making me doubt myself as a Christian. How could I possibly be a Christian if I felt this way about another person? I was not the only one in the office to feel unsettled and the whole situation was becoming so unbearable that I was seriously considering finding another job - having been in the same employment for 20 years meant this was a major decision to make, but I was prepared to go. I happened to go along to a prayer meeting one evening and there it was mentioned about praying for your enemies. I knew what I had to do immediately and, that night, I prayed for her and asked God to bless her and make her happy. The next morning I went into work to find the lady had handed her notice in and she left the company within the week - God had answered my prayer and taken the situation away.


More recently I was involved in making a difficult decision (I cannot explain the exact details here for confidentiality reasons) and had to place a vote which was in direct opposition to everyone else involved. The vote was whether we should take legal action against a third party and everyone else wanted to go ahead with this route. All of my Christian principles screamed at me to forgive this person and just let things go, although I knew that we were, legally, in the right and should this person be allowed to keep something that was not rightly theirs? After some very sleepless nights and a lot of praying I took the stand of saying 'no' to the prosecution route and placed my vote. Needless to say that everyone else voted to take it to the small claims court. Strangely, I was totally at peace with this and it was no longer keeping me awake at night and I knew I had done what God wanted me to. This was over six months ago and I think God must have been at work again and changed peoples hearts because everyone has been too busy to sort out the paperwork for this and nothing has happened.


I have now been at the same company for 34 years and, over that time, people have come and people have gone. The majority I have got along with very well and rarely have I worked with anyone that I did not like. However, the company has grown a lot in the last year rising from 60-70 employees to the present day 109 so it is no longer the small, family business that it once was. Amongst the new recruits there have been two members that I have found it difficult to feel comfortable with although both seem to be very proficient with their work so there would be no reason for them to go. I just thought it was simply that you can't get on with everyone and there are bound to be a few people you don't gel with in a company of that size. Then God reminded me of the time when I prayed for the lady I once worked with so I began to make a very conscious effort to go out of my way to be helpful and supportive of them - I have also prayed the same prayer as before, that they will be happy and blessed. I think God has decided that, this time, it is down to me to change because I suddenly realise that I now quite like these people and actually enjoy their company.


Only God can change your heart (or the heart of someone else), you cannot do it yourself, but, when you ask for help, be prepared for that to happen. We have one Mighty God who will always do what is best for us.

Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will be careful to observe My ordinances. Ezekiel 37:26-27