Know Your Wasps From Your Bees!

 (I was recently asked to write the message that goes on the front page of our bi-monthly chapel newsletter so looked back through some of my old journals for inspiration. I came across this which I wrote in pre-blog days, so a good 14 years ago and thought it worth resurrecting).

I hate to kill any living creature, which might seem strange as I am a professional horticulturalist. To squash a slug or snail, even without intention, sends a shudder through me. But, today, on purpose, I killed a wasp. It was one of those huge creatures that had been hibernating all winter, emerging with the sole purpose of multiplying its own kind over the summer. As I did the cruel deed (with a rather satisfying crunch) that often-expressed question came to mind. Why did God make wasps? What purpose do they have? Even the slugs, snails and aphids are more useful as the birds just love to gobble them up, so forming part of the food chain.

A close relation of the wasp is the bee. These busy little creatures work so hard, collecting pollen for honey and pollinating all our fruiting plants and flowers you can forgive them the sting in their tail. Even that is only ever used as a defence whereas the vicious old wasp will swoop on you and plunge its deadly poison into you for no reason at all except inflict pain. Do not ever get the two confused.

The wasp comes in causing children, women and, yes, men, to run screaming away flapping their arms in terror and forgetting everything they have been told to do. A pebble dropped in still water produces ripples going further and further out, so the wasp comes in causing mayhem and carnage. If one suddenly arrives through an open car window it could be the cause of a multiple car pile up on the motorway as the driver loses concentration in an attempt to ward it off. In just the same way false teachers come among us and stir up trouble with their lies and deception. A half-truth, a lie or slight deviation from the truth if told in the church can cause equal damage, dividing the fellowship with untold hurt.

The point of all this is that you should know your wasps from your bees in the same way you should know deception from the truth. And to do that you need to set aside time to study the word of God, be in prayer asking for guidance, and forming a close relationship with Jesus. As you get to know Him better and better you will be able to decern when something said is right or not. In the same way you will quickly learn the difference between a wasp and a bee if you look closely at them and see what fruit they produce. One will come at you, buzzing angrily, intent on giving you a vicious sting whilst the other gently hums as it floats from flower to flower making sweet honey and a productive garden. Choose wisely which one to associate with!

But false prophets also arose among the people, just as there will be false teachers among you, who will secretly bring in destructive heresies, even denying the Master who bought them, bringing upon themselves swift destruction. 2Peter 2:1

We can't always see the road ahead

It was going to be a busy morning. I had to walk the dogs, come back home to shower, get changed and breakfast, go and do the food shop, come back home and unload it all and then go back out to be at my weekly house group and all by 10am. I had mentally allowed myself an hour for the walk, an hour for the shop and another hour for getting myself ready and the travelling in between. leaving a little time to spare. My plans, my targets, I can do it all in my own strength! As often happens though, my plans were slightly thwarted and I was a bit late setting off to walk the dogs and they, of course, then contrived to sniff and scratch every blade of grass they passed so making our regular walk a good ten minutes longer than usual. By the time I had got them home, jumped in the shower and had breakfast, I had already used up most of the leeway time I had allowed. As I set off to do the shopping later than anticipated, I realised I was going to hit the school traffic on the usual route and was likely to be stuck in a traffic jam at a notorious bottle neck where traffic lights, crossings and roundabout converge so decided on the slightly longer option of going via the by-pass. I should not have bothered. As soon as I joined that road the traffic slowed and a long queue snaked ahead. It wasn't static but it wasn't moving very quickly either.

I began to mentally moan and complain to God. Why was everything conspiring against me this morning? And why was it that whenever I was in a queue of traffic the vehicle in front of me was so huge I couldn't see round it to be able to judge when we were able to move, or how far, until they started to roll? The clock was ticking and I thought I might have to miss the shopping this morning and do it later. My plans were all messed up!

Then it came to me. Life is just like this, we can't always see the way ahead and just have to wait and be patient. We don't know what God has planned for us, we just have to follow the road ahead and trust Him to get us to the other end. We do not, and may never, know what causes these holds up on our journey but it is all in God's will for our lives. Perhaps there has been an accident on the road ahead that, if I had been going at the proper speed and been a minute sooner, I might have been involved in. Perhaps God was just teaching me not to make my own plans rather than relying on His. Or perhaps He just wanted me to stop and admire the little jewels of roadside flowers, the rolling hills and simply enjoy His creation.

As I thought all this my mind calmed and I stopped stressing. Needless to say, the traffic suddenly started moving giving no sign as to why it had ever stopped, I did my shopping in record time and made the house group meeting spot on time. God is very good sometimes!

Obed-edom is Blessed

During my studies of the book of 1 Chronicles I have become rather fascinated by the little-known character of Obed-edom. Although I read the same account of him in 2 Samuel 6 I did not take much notice of him.

To set the scene, in 1 Chronicles 13 we hear how David was bringing the ark of God from Kiriath-jearmin to the city of David. As they were carrying the ark there were great celebrations before God with song and lyres, harps, tambourines, cymbals and trumpets – what a noisy party that must have been! As they reached the threshing floor of Kidon, the oxen pulling the cart stumbles so Uzzah put his hand out to steady the ark. The anger of the Lord was kindled against Uzzah and He struck him down and he died there. David was afraid of God that day and said, “How can I bring the ark of God home to me?”

And this is where we get our first mention of Obed-edom. Chapter 13, verses 13-14 tell us: “So David did not take the ark of God home into the city of David but took it aside to the house of Obed-edom the Gittite. And the ark of God remained with the household of Obed-edom in his house three months. And the Lord blessed the household of Obed-edom and all that he had.”

Hold on a moment – back up there! It suddenly struck me that Obed-edom was a Gittite. He wasn’t a Levite who were meant to be the only ones to look after, or even touch, the ark of God (as poor Uzzah discovered to his cost). Not only that but the Gittites came from Gath, one of the five principal cities of the Philistines (I had to look this up, I didn’t know this), who were the sworn enemies of Israel. Had not Goliath been killed by David when he was a boy? He had come from there too. So, what was David thinking by leaving the ark with this man? We can only assume that Obed-edom had turned from the Philistine ways and had become a faithful follower of God. God did not strike him down like Uzzah as we would expect. Ours is not to reason why, God sometimes works in mysterious ways! He does not do what we would do, he has a greater plan in mind.

I thought that was the end of Obed-edom until a few verses later when the ark was to be collected from him and taken to the city of David. This time it was carried by the Levites so was successfully delivered. David had commanded the chiefs of the Levites to appoint singers and musicians to raise sounds of joy whilst leading the ark home (another noisy party!). A long list of names is then given, all of which are very alien to my mind so I would normally tend to skip over them without too much thought. Then, suddenly, there he is again! In Chapter 15, verse 18, “…. the gatekeepers Obed-edom and Jeiel.” and in 15:21 “but Mattihiah, Eupheletius, Mikmeicih, Obed-edom, Jeiel and Azaziah were to lead with lyres according to the Sheminith” (see how easy it is to miss him amongst these names!). 15:24 also states that Obed-edom and Jehiah were to be gatekeepers for the ark.

So what does this mean? Has Obed-edom come with the ark from his house to the city of David? I suppose that once you have been so very close to the presence of God you would be totally bereft if it was taken away from you and you couldn’t help but follow it. As we read on we find that our man is listed amongst others who had been appointed to play harps and lyres before the ark regularly. So, we understand that he stayed in the presence of God and did not turn back.

This is not the last we hear of Obed-edom. A little bit further on in 16:38 we hear that not only is Obed-edom serving before the ark but 68 of his brothers are too. In chapter 26 it is particularly mentioned of him among the gatekeepers that he had been blessed by God with eight sons who went on to father many others who were all men of great ability. In total there were 62 men qualified for service over the age of 20 and they were allocated the south gate and gatehouse.

The final mention of Obed-edom does not come until 2 Chronicles 25:24 and is not a particularly happy event, although it does show how far he had come and how much he was trusted. We read that he was in charge of all the gold and silver vessels in the house of God, although, unfortunately, this is when they are being seized when Judah was defeated by Israel in battle – but that is another story.

What an amazing testimony! From being a Philistine living amongst giant men of war to serving the very presence of the living God and being entrusted with his treasures. I think I know which life I would choose! If I had skipped over that name in 1 Chronicles, as I had in Samuel, I would not have learnt of this humble, faithful servant of God. A gentile saved by the grace of God, just like many of us.

Open My Eyes

I am currently working my way through the books of Kings and Chronicles. Some of it is pretty boring stuff, some a bit gory, but every now and then there are some real gems.

This morning I was reading how Elisha the prophet had upset the King of Syria because he had forewarned the King of Israel as to where the Syrian army were going to be, so putting paid to the plan to ambush them. The King of Syria is so angry he sends his army after Elisha and they surround him and his servant overnight. 2 Kings 6:15-18 tells what happens next:  

When the servant of the man of God rose early in the morning and went out, behold, an army with horses and chariots was all around the city. And the servant said, "Alas, my master! What shall we do?" He (Elisha) said, "Do not be afraid, for those who are with us are more than those who are with them". Then Elisha prayed and said, "O Lord, please open his eyes that he may see". So the Lord opened the eyes of the young man, and he saw, and behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. And when the Syrians came down against him, Elisha prayed to the Lord and said, "Please strike this people with blindness". So He struck them with blindness in accordance with the prayer of Elisha.

This reading filled me with such joy and encouragement. How wonderful to know you are not alone as you walk your way through life for your are surrounded by the army of God, just waiting to step in and help us when we need it. Just because we cannot see those forces around us does not mean they are not there. Be brave! Just imagine the confidence that young servant of Elisha must have been given when he looked up and saw those horses and chariots of fire. They must have made the Syrian army seem like toy soldiers in comparison and his fear was gone. 

What do we not see as are eyes are drawn to the things of the earth rather than fixing them on Jesus? We miss out on His love, His peace, His comfort, His guidance and His companionship.

Psalm 121 is a good one to turn too when we are feeling overwhelmed and lost:

I lift up my eyes to the hills.

From where does my help come?

My help comes from the Lord,

who made heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot be moved;

he who keeps you will not slumber.

Behold, he who keeps Israel

will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper;

the Lord is your shade on your right hand.

The sun shall not strike you by day,

nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all evil;

he will keep your life.

The Lord will keep

your going out and your coming in

from this time forth and forevermore.

The Less Travelled Path

We have two Jack Russell Terriers, Milo and Millie who can be quite reactive to other dogs, Milo in particular, and I tend to choose the path that others are least likely to go on to limit any outbursts.

If I take the more popular path Milo will go wild when he sees another dog, which invariably sets Millie off too. They are barking and pulling and generally making a nuisance of themselves, the peace is shattered for miles around and I get anxious, hot and bothered, embarrassed and ultimately angry with them. All while trying to apologise to the other walkers whilst hanging on to two rabid creatures. Not a happy experience.

So having surveyed the land in front of me, I usually take the less used path walking three sides of a square before joining the main path rather than going straight down to it. Although further in distance it actually is easier doing this extended route as the dogs enjoy sniffing and mooching whilst I get peace and quiet listening to the skylarks singing overhead. In winter it has the added advantage of not being as muddy or slippery as it has less footfall. We all come back happy.

As I was walking them on Minchinhampton Common this morning the words "the less travelled path" came into my mind. In Jeremiah 6:16 it says: Thus says the Lord, "Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is, and walk in it, and find rest for your souls". In this verse God is telling us to search (study the scriptures) to find "the good way". If we do we will be rewarded by having rest for our souls. It is up to us to make that choice, we can either follow HIs ways or keep heading down a path that will end in misery and destruction. Keep walking the less travelled path.

As I am writing this I have the words of an old hymn going round in my head. They probably have no relationship with what I have said but they are such beautiful words I am adding them here:

Tell out, my soul, the greatness of the Lord!

Unnumbered blessings give my spirit voice;

tender to me the promise of his word –

in God my Saviour shall my heart rejoice.

Tell out, my soul, the greatness of his name!

Make known his might, the deeds his arm has done;

his mercy sure, from age to age the same –

his holy name: the Lord, the Mighty One.

Tell out, my soul, the greatness of his might!

Powers and dominions lay their glory by;

proud hearts and stubborn wills are put to flight,

the hungry fed, the humble lifted high.

Tell out, my soul, the glories of his word!

Firm is his promise, and his mercy sure:

tell out, my soul, the greatness of the Lord

to children’s children and for evermore!

The Vine & The Branches

Picture credit to my earthly
 father, Robert Allen.

I was reminded today of the analogy my old boss, Bonham Bazeley, would give to demonstrate why you should prune a fruit tree and what happens when you do. He would tell you to imagine a hose pipe connected to a tap. When the tap is turned on water flows from the end of the hosepipe just as sap flows through a plant causing the tip to grow. If you then make slits in the hose pipe to represent the tight, dormant fruit buds along the stem, the water, initially will continue to flow from the end of the pipe. Put a bung in the end of the hosepipe and water will then be forced out through the slits - this is what happens when you prune the end of the branch so stopping the flow of sap to the tip and pushing it into the buds instead making them grown out.

In our house group we have been discussing the vine and the branches as Jesus talked about in John 15 and how God prunes those branches to produce fruit. Consider then that we are dormant buds and Jesus in the main stem with His feet firmly planted in the good soil. The Holy Spirit is represented by the sap and God is the gardener who comes along and lops of dead or unproductive branches that do not produce any fruit. The Holy Spirit comes and wakens us dormant buds and brings us to life so we burst forth bearing lots of beautiful fruit.

The process of being pruned seems painful at the time but God is the perfect gardener and knows what needs cutting out of us to produce fruit for Him.

“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser.  Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit." John 15:1-2

Slow down and listen

As I work my way through the Bible I have decided to intersperse each book with a few Psalms. As they are so varied it does not matter if they are not done continuously and I feel that doing all 150 in one go might be too much. So, having finished the book of Philippians, I thought I would easily do my first ten this morning. Wrong!! Psalm 1 only contains six verses but after an hour and a half I was still finding lots of different things to think about. With so many Psalms to turn to we all have our favourites and I suspect, like me, this first one often gets missed although it is well worth a look at.

Perhaps God is trying to teach me about my "selfish ambition and conceit" which I only wrote about yesterday. I said I was going to study and finish ten Psalms this morning but He said, "No, one is enough, and do it well!"

This is what I learned from that Psalm today. You can choose to walk in one of two ways, either wickedly or righteously. The wicked will be driven away "like chaff that the wind drives away, and their way will perish." They will not be able to stand in the presence of God or even amongst the righteous on judgement day. How awful to be banished from the comfort and love of God's arms forever! It does not say they will perish (which would actually be a better outcome than living without God) but their ways will perish - no more sin. 

The righteous are blessed by not mixing with the wicked but, instead, "delight in the law of the Lord and meditate on it day and night". Verse 3 says, "In all that he does he prospers", which I don't think is meant to be a 'prosperity gospel' but by reading your Bible daily and meditating on it you more likely to be tuned in to what God's plan for you it and will follow it. If you do what God wants He will make it a success and provide everything you need to make it happen. It says you will prosper in all that you do, not that you will have lots of material possessions. Think of Paul - he certainly prospered in spreading the gospel and glorifying God but he definitely didn't have an easy life with lots of money and nice houses. He suffered physically but was spiritually very rich.

So, to conclude, to be blessed we should study our Bibles, listen to what God wants us to do and do it. By so doing He will help us succeed. Do not be rejected, worthless, empty and without God, like the chaff blown away by the wind. And do not be conceited and think you are able to race through your studies - God wants you to slow down and listen.

Rejoice in the Lord, always.

As I started a study of the book of Philippians I thought it would not take me long as there are just four chapters and I would quickly whizz through them. How wrong I was! One of the things to do in the study was to record all the instructions that Paul gives to the Philippians and, boy, was I challenged as I worked my way through the book. 

There were three of these instructions that particularly stabbed at me. The first was in Chapter 2, verse 3, "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves". I know that I am guilty of pride and like 'showing off' how much Bible study I have done compared to others, and I am not always that patient or kind. I will pray on this and work to not boast (except in the name of Jesus). I should give my time generously and make an effort to listen to those who aren't always included or who find it hard to understand things.

Further on in this chapter in verse 12 it tells us "to work out our own salvation with fear and trembling for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure". Those who know me are aware that I sometimes doubt my own salvation but here it is, saying that it is God doing it all - how awesome!

Chapter 2 verse 15 chides us into "doing all things without grumbling or disputing", (yes, that does include emptying the dishwasher for the third time that day!), And why? So we are "blameless and innocent children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom we shine as lights in the world and holding fast the world of life".

Despite this book being full of personal challenges, there are at least twelve mentions of the words "joy" and "rejoice" and for the majority of the time I was studying the book of Philippians, that lovely, lively chorus was going over and over in my mind - "Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say rejoice" and comes directly from Chapter 4 verse 4. Although I have lots to think about and address, I still found that wonderful, uplifting joy that can only be found in our Lord.

Unlock Your Heart

Lunchtime today saw me sitting in my car in the gateway to a field waiting for my son to walk the dogs. It was a beautiful sunny day and very peaceful with few cars passing on the road behind me. The sun was warm and there were early signs of spring showing in a haze of faint colour on the trees and hedges around me.

As I waited I pondered on the sermon given at chapel earlier today. The subject was taken from Matthew 7:23 when Jesus says, "I never knew you". What a terrifying thought! I prayed that Jesus really does know me and, when the time comes, I will not be left behind. I asked for Him to show me He was with me. As I opened my eyes I was aware of the gate in front of me, topped with barbed wire and held together with a sturdy padlock and chain. Beyond was the glorious field surrounded by trees and I hoped this was not the message God meant for me! Is my heart locked and guarded against letting Him in leaving me with just glimpses of the wonderful paradise beyond? No! Jesus has the key to that padlock and will throw away that chain flinging wide the gates so I can walk through into His arms. 

Prayer: Lord, come into my heart and teach me your ways. Amen,

Make a Joyful Noise

I am sometimes asked to read out the notices at the beginning of our morning service at chapel, which I am happy to do. However, I always feel slightly inadequate as others who do this task usually bring a word, scripture or testimony as well and I have not felt comfortable doing that. This morning I am to read the notices again and for the last couple of days I have been looking for something suitable to bring but to no avail.

This morning I was looking at the Psalms when one little phrase stood out to me as I found it repeated in three fairly close together. I know the words might be different in other translations but the phrase in my Bible is 'make a joyful noise'. This made me smile as I imagined God having to listen to the screeching, growling and misplaced notes that invariably occur during our singing of hymns, all far from the heavenly choir of angels mentioned in the scriptures. But God is not like us, He listens to the heart producing these sounds. As long as we are doing these things joyfully and full of worship for Him, He will accept these praises like a proud father listening to their child playing their first tentative notes on the recorder or violin (and we all know what that sounds like!).

Needless to say, this is the message I gave to the church this morning and ended by saying that is does not matter if you can't sing in tune, just make a joyful noise!

Psalm 95:1-2 Oh come, let us sing to the Lord. Let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation! Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving. Let us make a joyful noise to Him with songs of praise!

Psalm 94:4 Make a joyful noise to the Lord all the earth; break forth into joyous song and sing praises!

Psalm 100:1-5 Make a joyful noise to the Lord all the earth! Serve the Lord with gladness! Come into His presence with singing! Know that the Lord, He is God. It is He who made us, and we are His, we are His people and the sheep of His pasture. Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise! Give thanks to Him, bless His name! For the Lord is good; His steadfast love endures forever, and His faithfulness to all generations.

Here I am, send me!

Do you ever feel that God is trying to tell you something? Over the last month or so there have been a series of suggestions that He is trying to get my attention - I can imagine His frustration as I quietly amble on my way, oblivious, whilst He is throwing hints at me with the force of a sledgehammer!

Before Christmas I started a Bible Study on Isaiah which, to be honest, I am finding quite hard. The study is broken down into three sections and, two months into the course, I am still working on the first twelve chapters. Although the subject matter needs a lot of concentration to understand what is being said, a few verses pop out at me, as often happens when you read the Bible, which I feel are meant for me at this time. The one in particular that keeps hitting me is Isaiah 6:8 - Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?” Then I said, “Here am I. Send me!” I have prayed about this, asking God to reveal to me what He wants me to do or where He wants me to go, I told Him I am open to whatever He suggests but have not had an answer (or one that I have heard). I thought I must have been imagining things and carried on as before.

In early January my husband had to go for a routine kidney scan - he had bladder cancer a few years ago and has to have annual tests. The last test was all clear but they wanted the kidney scan done as part of the process. Although the results for the kidneys came back all clear we were horrified to hear that a lump had been detected in his breast and he was immediately sent to the Breast Cancer Clinic in Cheltenham. The prognosis was not looking good. After a mammogram and biopsies the doctors were pretty certain this was cancer, and the biopsy results should confirm this in a couple of weeks time - he was told he should bring me along with him to that appointment. The good news was that the cancer hadn't spread to the lymph nodes and should be treatable. He was already on our prayer chain from chapel and as I told them of the results I said we were just thankful that it had been picked up by chance and it had not spread. I also specifically said to one friend that I was praying that when we went to the appointment they would be proved wrong and it was just a cyst or something benign. I also said that the chorus the children had song that morning in church had bought me great peace and comfort - Fix your eyes on Jesus - and that's just what I was doing. A week later my prayer was answered (why am I always surprised by this?). Martin had a phone call from the hospital to say the test results had come in, the tumor was benign and he did not even have to go for the appointment on the Friday. I felt like I was walking on air and kept praising God for what he had done. I even told my non-believing husband that he had been on the prayer chain and that God had healed him. God had heard my prayer.

The following Sunday at chapel the worship team played two songs - firstly one with the chorus Here I am, wholly available - as for me, I will serve the Lord, shortly followed by "I the Lord of Sea and Sky" which has the chorus Here I am Lord. Is it I Lord? I have heard you calling in the night. I will go Lord, if you lead me. I will hold your people in my heart. Yes, Lord, there is definitely a theme going on here but I still don't know what I am to do. I did a little study on 'Here I am' as I knew is was elsewhere in the Bible but the only think that I could glean from that was Isaiah was the only one who volunteered to go whereas the others were responding to their names being called. A subtle reminder to be ready when God calls.

Last Sunday morning I was talking to my dear sister in Lord, Rosie. She said she thought she had a message for the church but there had not been an opportunity to give it that day so she proceeded to tell me about it. She had been driving to the service that morning and been stopped by a set of temporary traffic lights and she feared she was going to be late. As the lights changed she went on through the lights and, looking in the rearview mirror she saw a stream of cars behind her and thought, "come on through", the road is clear. As she drove on further all the lights were green so she could "come on through" - and she arrived at the chapel on time. As she was telling me this I just knew the message was meant for me and told her I thought she had told the person who needed to hear it. Again, this week I have been praying for clarification and meaning to all of this but know I must be patient as God will reveal all in His time.

A final nudge this week was in the daily scripture that pops up on my phone every morning. The one on Tuesday was a paraphrase of Ezra 10:4, Rise up ...... take courage and do it.

God has my attention! Here I am Lord, I will go if you lead me, I will come on through when you call. I will rise up, take courage and do it. I just don't know what 'it' is but I hope to recognize it when it does arrive.

Strange Dream

Last night I had the strangest of dreams and it came as something of a wake up call (pardon the pun).

I was walking through a store that looked remarkably like Dunelm in Gloucester with a group of people (I cannot remember who they were) when I turned down one aisle. Everything was in black and white and there were rails of Halloween costumes hanging up - white ghosts outfits and black witches capes and hats. The voices of the people I was with faded away and it became colder and darker. I was suddenly terrified, feeling evil all around me and knew this was hell. Not the fiery furnace we believe to await those who do not believe in Jesus but just as horrifying as God was no longer with me, I could not feel His presence and I was totally lost. And then I awoke.

What could this mean? I have often doubted my own faith - not that God isn't capable of saving me, that has never been in question, but do I truly believe that He can, is my faith as big as even a mustard seed? Am I on my way to hell? In that moment as I woke I knew that I never wanted to be apart from God, the alternative is too frightening and I prayed again for forgiveness and asked Jesus to fill me anew with His Holy Spirit and I felt peace and calm. I know that I never want to walk down that aisle again and I am now assured that I do not have to.

Don't worry, the seed has already been sown!

I have two sons aged 34 and 27 who are very much my Cain and Abel. The younger one has followed me in my Christian faith and gave his heart to the Lord when he was 15 – although he has taken a step back from the church at the moment, I know he still believes and have no worries about his salvation and he is already talking about coming back. Both went to a C of E school and attended Boys Brigade and whilst the younger one continued attending church, playing bass guitar in the worship group and getting baptised, the older one stopped going before he became a teenager. He became very rebellious and we had 10 years of utter nightmare with him before he eventually settled down in a job he loves.

Unfortunately, Christianity has become a forbitten subject with him – he just does not want to know, there is no hope of taking to him and he will even began criticising so I have to bite my tongue to not snap at him and exercise the turning of the other cheek instead. It has become easier to avoid talking about faith at all and I haven’t tried to for several years. I have been extremely guilty that I could not talk to him about such an important thing and I worried that I, or worse still he, might die without telling him especially since Covid-19 has made us all realise just how fragile life can be.

However, I had the slightest glimmer of hope of Friday. He came into the living room (yes, this one still lives at home) and asked what I was up to. I told him I was going to church and he looked at me strangely and asked what day of the week it was. I replied that is was Good Friday which happens to be one of the most important dates in the Christian calendar as it was the day Jesus died. He simply said, “but then he was born again”.

Conversation over but, oh, how joyful that has made me feel. I have no need to feel guilty because he already knows the truth, the seed had already been sown when he was a child. I am not hoping for miracles, although one would be good, but just knowing there is a little seed planted somewhere deep inside him that one day may grow and blossom is a very comforting thought. All I can do now is continue to pray for him, the rest is between him and God.

Without God

I have just read George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-four. A compelling read, albeit a rather disturbing one as so many of the ideas written about in 1949 are scarily possible today. The one thing I found so awful though, was the apparent lack of any religion of any sort, it was not allowed. Can you imagine a life where there is no choice, no hope, no certainty of a better future, no comfort from a Lord and Saviour, no God? It would be a living hell and surely George Orwell's book gives a foretaste of what actual hell will be like for those who have not yet given their hearts to the Lord. To be separated from God does not bear thinking about and yet that is what is promised to those who refuse to believe.

A few weeks ago I had my Bible bag stolen - it is not necessary for me to list here the whys, wherefores, how, who and what but, needless to say, it caused a lot of inconvenience and unnecessary worry. The one thing that should have been the easiest to replace was the Bible itself but this has proved to be the hardest loss of all.

A few years ago I was introduced to the Precept Ministries Inductive Bible Study and this rather large tomb was the one I used for this purpose. The study encourages highlighting key words and phrases with different colours and symbols which makes it easier to examine them more closely and cross reference them with other Scriptures. Prior to this, I had never liked marking any sort of book and would never even turn over a corner of a page to keep my place. As I could not bare to deface a Bible I already had I purchased this one specifically for studying. The Bible itself contains all the instructions for each of the 66 books within and I had spent the best part of the last decade gradually working my way through. I had only Matthew and Mark left to study in the New Testament and had completed well over a third of the Old Testament books so my Bible was much marked and well worn - an old friend that I was very comfortable with. Every week day morning I get myself ready then sit down between 7-7.30am to study my Bible before breakfasting and going off to work. Everyone else is still in bed and it is my special time with the Lord.

The morning after my bag had been stolen I sat down to my study as usual and pulled out one of my (many) other Bibles. Fortunately, I could still remember the subject I had been looking at and was able to continue with this for the rest of the week. But then I ground to a halt. With no instructions on what to do I began to flounder and couldn't get motivated. I was flicking through, opening pages at random hoping that God would make something leap of the page. For two weeks I carried on in this pattern, starting to feel anxious, depressed and generally miserable and hardly reading anything of God's word at all. Then came a week's holiday from work (we did not go away, just visiting relatives and pottering around) and my routine was disturbed so I didn't even bother with the aimless page turning. I felt totally restless and empty - something was most definitely lacking in my life and I knew what it was - God!

I had certainly been speaking to Him over the last few weeks (shouting too at times!) and had prayed for the person who had taken my bag. I had no ill feeling towards that person and asked that they would open my Bible and read it or, failing that, the person who found it might do - as long as it was not wasted, thrown in some bin.

My lovely Bible was gone, covered in all my colourful markings, showing everyone who saw me reading it it how good I was and how much time I must have spent on it. I loved it when a passage I had completed was read out in church and anyone near me could get a glimpse of how much I had done. I had started to race through each section eager to mark off another book as done and trying to estimate how long it would take me to complete the whole Bible - I couldn't wait, how proud I would be. 

And then it hit me - Pride! Perhaps God had taken this Bible from me because I was too conceited over what I had done in it rather than what He was showing me. Maybe my rush to get through the studies was taking over from the content and God wanted me to slow down and actually digest what He was saying to me. I needed to forget the past (I am highly unlikely to get back my old Bible) and start anew so, on Saturday evening, I ordered a new Bible - the same translation as the one I have lost but without all the study guides and it duly arrived the next day.

Today is Bank Holiday Monday but I arose early while the rest of the house was asleep and stole downstairs. I picked up my new Bible and also a book I had had some time called Come Walk In My Ways by Kay Arthur which uses the Inductive Study method - this book is going to cover 1&2 Kings and 2 Chronicles. I took up my coloured pens and started marking key words.

That first chapter this morning has been balm to my soul and I could feel peace and calm come over me as I worked. Just the act of marking the text is very therapeutic but it was more than that - I was very conscious of taking all the words in slowly and letting them breathe through me. Today I have felt calm and happier in myself than I have for a while.

I had been quite despondent at the thought of all that lost work and having to start over again - especially as I could quite clearly see the end goal and had been charging towards it. Once I had ticked off a book I was always reluctant to go back and re-read it when there were still new ones to be studied, "I know that part, why should I go back and look again?".O foolish woman! God has other plans and has given you a new start. I now have, literally, a clean slate and can take in things through fresh eyes with a fresh page to look at each morning. There will be nothing to spoil or distract the view of any revelation that might be given me today, no hang over from yesterday. I am free to read and learn and discover again.

The Lord's loving-kindnesses indeed never cease, 

for His compassions never fail.

They are new every morning; 

Great is Your faithfulness

Lamentations 3:22-23

Little Things

Last August my husband, myself and our two dogs spent a week in a little cottage just a minute from a beach where we walked each morning and evening. The beach was made up of mostly pebbles and rocks with odd strips of sand and was practically deserted. At the top of the beach was a row of mixed chalets and bungalows and we would often see their residents sitting outside enjoying the sea air.

Our attention was drawn to one man who, evening after evening, would be carrying boulders and stones, one at a time, to create a barrier between the row of chalets and a small stream that ran down past them its way to the sea. It seemed a rather pointless task and we did not quite understand the logic behind the intensity in his actions as he laboured away. After a couple of days of nodded "hello's" our curiosity got the better of us and my husband stopped and asked him what he was doing. He explained that, in the past when the stream had become swollen with rain, it had breached the natural banks and rushed in front of the chalets, eroding the banks and threatening their very existence. If he did not build up breaches it would do the same again so he had set himself the quest of protecting his property and those of his neighbours. 


It seemed rather a thankless task to me and I couldn't help thinking that he was rather wasting his time as the vast and mighty ocean just a few meters in front the the houses was surely a far greater threat as it crashed headlong on to the beach than a small, tinkling stream. 
As we walked away from him I was suddenly reminded of the little foxes in the Songs of Solomon. It is the small things in our lives that can bring about ruin and destruction if left unchecked.The world is full of the big problems which we, personally, have no (or very little) control over - wars, famines, earthquakes, political unrest, the dreaded Brexit, etc. Yes, they are there. Yes, they are a threat. But, like the mighty ocean crashing on that small Welsh beach, we can do nothing to halt their progress. The small things, however, that niggle away at us - that little white lie, our laziness, ignoring those near us in need - these things we can address and, by doing so, will actually make a difference to our own lives as well as those we touch. Tell the truth and you will not have your conscience pricking at you, get up and clean those kitchen cupboards and you will have that feeling of satisfaction of a job well done, send a card to someone who you haven't seen for a while and brighten their day. These little acts might not seem much but, just like the man on the beach, they could, metaphorically,  manage to stop your house being washed away.

Catch us the foxes, the little foxes that spoil the vines, for our vines have tender grapes. Song of Solomon 2:15

Sowing Seeds

Today is Harvest Sunday and the speaker at chapel today, like many others across the land I suspect, chose a reading from Mark's gospel - a parable about a man who sows some seeds then, day and night, as he works and as he sleeps, the seeds sprout and climb out into the light, even though he doesn’t understand how it works. The speaker then produced a couple of conkers that he had picked up and said how hard it was to imagine how they had enough energy inside of them to produce a huge tree.

This got me to thinking and expanding on what he had said. Yes, the seed has enough energy to produce a tree but not before it reaches out and takes water, nutrients and sunshine. It does not do it without help.

Imagine that our Christian life starts like that seed, slightly withered, nothing significant at all, just waiting for something to happen but, to all appearances, dead to the world. Then the good Lord sends His rain which might be in the form someone who has steadily been praying for you or maybe they have sat you down and drenched you with the words of the gospel. Your hard, outer coating begins to soften and suddenly, gradually even, that moment happens, and from your dead heart begin the stirrings of new life.

First you reach out a tiny shoot of hope and feel around. You see light - it is good! More rain falls and the sun shines on you and you feel little threads of roots beginning to form, wriggling down and around as you feast on the scriptures, holding on firmly to the truths you have read and heard, taking everything in just like a plant taking nutrients from the soil.

Your roots grow deeper still as you begin to meet with other Christians and begin to pray and have conversations with the Lord. You grow taller and begin to form leaves which divide into branches.Sometimes the sun is shining on you and you can bathe in that glorious warmth. At other times the winds blow so hard you fear your roots will be ripped right out but if you have a strong hold on that rock beneath you nothing will make you let go.

Slugs and bugs and mildews are always around, just like those everyday minor issues that eat away at you. The odd white lie hear, a bit of gossip there, you're too tired to read your Bible today, worries and cares - they can alter your appearance and stunt your growth. You must remember to reach out those branches, praying to the Lord for help and guidance, asking for forgiveness, turning back to Him and letting your roots take up the support offered by your fellow Christians.

As a tree waits for a change in the seasons so we must wait on the Lord. Just as a tree drops it's leaves carrying the slugs and bugs and mildew, in autumn all our cares and worries will, too, fall away. As a tree sleeps and protects itself against the ravages of winter we should take a time to rest and recover as we delight in the scriptures and converse with our Lord, ready to break forth refreshed and new again in the spring.

As summer comes we will mature and start to form beautiful flowers so everyone will easily recognise which family we belong to. As the flowers fade seeds begin to develop which eventually ripen and ready to fall. Not all our seeds are productive. Some are greedily taken by squirrels who bury them in the stump of a tree for future use but, invariably, forget where they left them and they rot away. Others are blown away on the wind, never to be seen again and we may never know what happened to them. But none of this is our concern. All we have to do is produce the seed and fling it out on whoever passes by - the Lord will do the rest.

And the answer is..........

When the date was getting close to my son taking his R.E. GCSE exam I asked him how his revising was coming along. His reply was there was no need to study because the only answers you needed for this particular paper were God, Jesus and The Bible. He bore this out by saying one of the questions in the mock paper was “who did the two disciples meet on the Damascus Road” so, not knowing the answer, opted for one of his stock replies, Jesus – and, of course, he was right. 

Whereas this might be a somewhat flippant response, typical of a teenage boy not wanting to waste precious moments going over old notes when he could be linking up with his friends on Xbox, and not particularly showing our education system in very good light if there really were only three possible choices for the answers in this subject, it did get me to thinking that he wasn't far from the truth. By turning to God, Jesus or The Bible the majority of today’s problems can either be solved or we will be given the strength, change of attitude or ability to work them through.

God is the creator of all things and, as I sit typing this in my garden on a warm May afternoon, it is easy to believe this. The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming and white fluffy clouds drift across the sky. The sound of my neighbours enjoying the day in their gardens with happy children laughing as they splash in a paddling pool while the mouth-watering smell of BBQ’s drifts through the air make for an idyllic picture of family life and it is natural to thank God for all He has provided. It is not always so easy to do this when the rain and wind come, the neighbours are fighting with each other and the kids are screaming but God is still there all the same, loving us through the good and the bad and He always wants the best for us whether we see it or not. We just need to trust in Him and focus on what He wants us to do, not what the world is telling us do. We have to remember that God has a different agenda to ours and His plan is far more intricate than we ever dare imagine. Do what you know is right with Him and everything else will fall in to place. It might seem impossible and you feel the task is too mighty but if it is from God the doors will open and He will give you strength and knowledge. With God all things are possible and He has the answer to everything.

Jesus is not only the Son of God, He is our friend, our brother, our Saviour and even acts as an intercessor between us and our heavenly Father. He is also very much alive and lives in every believer’s heart through His Holy Spirit. With this we are equipped to discern what is good and bad, what is from God and what is not and enables us to tap into the very thoughts of God. Jesus loved us all so much that He took our place on the cross and died for our sins. Just think, the very worst thing that you have ever done was the very moment that He died in your place – it makes me so ashamed to think that He even knows what I did, let alone took my punishment for me. All I have to do is believe who He is, what He did and that He was raised, victorious, from the dead and I will spend eternity with Him – how incredible is that? But while I am here on earth in my mortal body I can talk to Him and ask Him to show me the way He wants me to go. All the answers lie with Jesus so just fix your eyes on Him and you cannot go wrong.

The Bible is the very word of God in handy book form for us to delve into whenever we want. Whatever you want to know in relation to the way you live or about getting on with others, you will find the answer in this wonderful book. It never ceases to amaze me that I can read a particular passage of scripture time and time again, believing I understand what it is saying then, suddenly, the meaning changes and leaps at me off the page coming alive and becoming relevant to a particular circumstance I am in at that moment. Of course, this is not always a pleasant experience because sometimes the words convict me of something that is wrong in my life which I need to change. Just like old Jonah who’s first instinct was to run in the opposite direction from where God wanted him to go, I do not always want to obey what the Word is telling me and quickly turn the page. However, the Bible is no ordinary book, it might have been written thousands of years ago but it is just as relevant to me today as it was when it was first put on paper. This is the living Word of God and it will not let me go – every time I open my Bible the same message comes through loud and clear, wherever I turn – even when I am in church and others read or preach I hear that same message piercing its way into my heart.  In the end my only option is to do what it is telling me. And then I have peace.

Of course, as a more mature Christian I would also add the Holy Spirit and prayer to the list as they act as ‘telephone lines’ between the others but I don’t think my son was far wrong in his statement – the answer to all questions is either God, Jesus or The Bible!

Focus on the Details!

 I recently bought myself a new camera and have been getting to grips with all the features it contains. Yesterday was a beautiful day (unusual for a Bank Holiday Weekend) so I spend some time out in the garden playing with my new toy and really finding out what it can do. One of the features I had rather ignored was the automatic focus button and thought it was something that was beneath my capabilities as an experienced photographer - perhaps not in a dissimilar way to how we think we know better than God when we disregard that small, still voice in our heads in preference to doing something the way we want to do it. How many times when we have failed at doing it our way do we realise that simple idea that we pushed aside was actual the best way and the job would have been done in half the time had we tried it first?


 Getting back to the camera, I had tried all of the other features and taken numerous trips back into the house to upload pictures I had taken and study them to see how they had turned out and thought I would do a comparison with the auto focus and scene selector button. I sat in my chair on the decking and zoomed in on various plants and features in the garden that were way quite some distance away and could not even make out clearly with my naked eye. I was stunned by the results. Everything came into sharp focus and really made things stand out in sharp relief as it clouded out the background. That button that I had discounted was simply amazing.

Once again I was reminded of Jesus. How often He is just a blurred image in our thoughts and minds - we know He is there but we just don't look very closely. But, oh, the wonders when we do finally fix our minds on Him and focus on him properly. He stands out clearly and the rest of the world seems to fade away - just in the words of that old hymn - Turn your eyes upon Jesus, Look full in His wonderful face, And the things of this earth will grow strangely dim, In the light of His Glory and grace.

So, what lessons has my camera taught me? To begin with, never consider myself to be so good at something I have no need of being shown another way, especially without even trying it first. If I try it and don't like it or don't think it any better than what I am already doing then, fair enough, carry on as I was but I never know what delights I might discover if I don't try something new.

More importantly, I know I should fully focus on my Lord and King and spend time in His presence and concentrate on Him and, when I do, He will be there, magnificent and glorious. He truly is a beautiful Saviour and worthy of gazing at - the more I look, the more I see and the more I listen the more I learn. Ever patient, ever faithful, ever waiting for me to turn to Him, He is always there in the background of my life, often neglected and forgotten, but when I zoom in with that automatic focus He takes pride of place and He is simply wonderful.

God is my strength.

As I sat down at my desk at work today I had that feeling of rising panic that threatened to engulf me as I looked at all of the things I had to do and yet did not quite know where to start.

All of a sudden the words 'God is my strength' came into my mind rapidly followed by more phrases. As I was already sitting at my computer I quickly started to type and, for a few minutes, the words flowed. It was the strangest feeling that it was me praying the words to God but it was Him who was giving me the words to say. At the same time everything around me faded away, the chatter of people on the shop floor below me, the churning of the heating system and the drone of the fridges and freezers in the food hall all ceased to exist and I had a feeling of tremendous calm and peace. Time seemed to stand still although, in reality, it was only a couple of minutes.

When the world came back into focus I emailed myself the words that had flowed and it is only now, reading them back, that I recognise that they are not particularly words and phrases that I would have used myself and are interspersed with verses from Scripture. I am more and more convinced that the Holy Spirit was interceding for me, just as it says in Romans 8:26 - In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words;.

As for the work load, it was nothing. I skipped through everything and cleared work that had been sitting there for weeks. God was in control of my life today and I feel Blessed.

Here are the words that came to me:

God is my strength my rock and my fortress in Him do I trust, He is a shield about me. I turn to Him in anguish, I trust Him with all my heart and lean on Him for understanding and let peace fill my heart. Blessed is His holy name. My heart sings for joy as His blessings shower upon me. Thank you my God and King you have saved me from the miry pit. O holy one, redeemer of Israel and creator of all mankind your greatness and righteousness abound for all eternity. Your loving kindness will last forever and I will sit at your feet in wonder and awe.

Butterflies!

Alive in Christ

Around three months ago two peacock butterflies came in on the same day and took up residence in a high corner of our bathroom where they have sat, side by side ever since with their wings tightly closed hiding their beautiful colouring within. After a few days they had not moved and I thought they had just died. I know this does not say a lot for my house keeping skills but I could not bring myself to get them down and there they have sat, two dead, colourless leaves. Until yesterday. As I was taking a shower I suddenly felt something gently land on my arm and, when I looked, found this beautiful butterfly sitting there. Not wanting it to drown I quickly removed it to the top of the shower curtain and from there is flew off and landed on the opposite wall from where it had come from.

Dead in Adam

Initially I thought that this was another butterfly just come in out of the cold but when I looked up, to my surprise, there was nothing where once the two lifeless butterflies had sat so I started looking round for the second one. And there it was, hanging from the light switch cord, wings closed once more. After such a long time of hibernation what had made them come to life, fly around for a few minutes and then settle back to darkness once again? This morning they were still in their new positions but a couple of hours later they have gone, disappeared completely. I do not know where.

It has got me thinking that these butterflies are a little bit like our (or my) Christian life. We bring it out into the sunshine every now and again, flutter around, touching everyone who sees us, doing good and living the way that Jesus wants us to but, all too often, we hide ourselves away in a dark corner with the shutters drawn where no one can see our best bits and we don't tell anyone about the love that Jesus has to offer. I would like to think that those two butterflies are now dancing over the gardens and flowers in the sunshine making everyone who sees them wish that they could be the same as those two beautiful creatures and seeing they have something special inside them that they want too. That is exactly what we should be doing - going out and making disciples of all nations and taking the gospel to all the world and not hugging it to ourselves. Once in a while we have to let go of our cosy little hidey hole and trust God to guide us to where He wants us to be and to do what He created us to do. We should be like a butterfly and leave a little mark on everyone we touch, whether they choose to take any notice of it or not we will have done what God wants.